First Christmas

I'll never forget our first Christmas eve in our new home on Yorba street. Chris came home for dinner that evening and we had kielbasa casserole (one of his favorites) while the kids had popcorn chicken. It was memorable because it was our first candlelit dinner. We turned out all the lights and the kids enjoyed the bright flames.

After opening a few gifts that Hadley bought from her school gift shop we read the story of the first Christmas in Luke and tried to have as reverent of an evening as possible with a five, three, almost 2 year old and a sleeping infant. Hadley was so excited to give her gifts - stuffed turtle toys for Vincent and Lauren, a key chain for daddy and a resin teddy bear holding a heart for me. I love that she could have the chance to really feel the true meaning of Christmas - selfless giving. And how excited she was to give and make others happy.

After the kids went to bed I made 'preparations' for the morning and laid down on the couch and found It's A Wonderful Life on television. I can never watch the entire movie but am always amazed at how much I enjoy it and will watch tidbits of it whenever I get the chance. I can't remember what Chris was doing for the most part - I think he was doing work upstairs in his office. I just remember being sooo happy. I don't think life can ever get better than Christmas eve. The tree lights on, gifts under the tree, and sleeping children awaiting the magic of all that Christmas is.

I remember this evening so vividly though and figured there was a reason for this and that I should write it down.

Bedtime

Tonight I thought about how much I will miss having all four kids with me in every room I go and before bedtime. While the kids took a bath, I nursed Gentry. The three older ones were being silly and playing while we put on pajamas in Lauren's room and they jumped on the bed and played games for the next 50 minutes or so - laughing and jumping - while I cleaned up in my room. Gentry played on the floor and the kids were holding hands and all jumping on the bed together. I wanted to try and capture this moment for myself. Someday our bedtime ritual will be different - maybe even more complex (if that is possible) and I will long for the days when my four kids just played with one another and waited for me to guide them to bed.

I'll have to remind myself of this as well on most nights that I do the bedtime routine all by myself with four kids. I can't wait to be able to sit and read stories to them all and cuddle with each one. Considering I do bedtimes 98 per cent of the time by myself, I think I am going to miss the routines with little ones.

Temple Song

Lauren loves to be rocked before bedtime. Her favorite song request is the "Temple Song" (I love to see the temple) or "church song" (I am a child of God). I love singing/humming these tunes to her before putting her to bed. We are starting to expand our repertoire to telling stories, talking about our day and new church songs. She is so fun to sit and hold and rock with her bottle and blankie at night but even better when she wakes cheerfully in the morning. Most mornings she just waits in her crib for someone to come in and get her and then jumps up and smiles.

Two Years Old and thoughts

It is amazing how different "two" can look amongst children. I only say this b/c Lauren is such a different two year old than Hadley. Tonight she put on her pajama bottoms all by herself! She is such an independent little spirit and always insists on doing things 'self'. She can ride Vincent's tricycle - a skill Hadley was uninterested in learning until she was almost five. In the same ways Vincent takes after or looks to Hadley's example, Lauren does the same with Vincent. They are much more alike - except for tonight when I came downstairs and saw the girls both sitting with open library books on their laps. Vincent has NEVER looked through a book by himself. There again, Hadley at age two was well-versed and read books to herself all the time while Lauren is just becoming interested in them.

Ask more than just me but it feels like Lauren has been with us forever. There is no way she has only been here for two years, most of which she was just a baby. I don't know why this is. I have caught myself checking, double-checking my math and her birth date. It is amazing.

Every day I am amazed by the new skills they all acquire. I can't believe that I have two children who can dress themselves (for the most part). Maybe I never thought the day would come or I thought I'd always be dressing four kids but it doesn't happen like that. Someday we'll say goodbye to all diapers for good. Someday every one of them will dress themselves. And you know what . . . I think it'll be okay b/c then I know we'll be on to new and better things and doing more stuff.

"I have only known her for two years. But if you took every memory, every moment, if you stretched them end to end--they'd reach forever."
Jodi Picoult -My Sister's Keeper

This phrase struck me after Lauren's 2nd birthday this past week and thinking about all the memories of all of my children. As a mother, the memories of every moment are indelible.

Sick Days

Having sick kids is never a picnic. While some kids seem to handle illness better than others there is usually a little silver-lining: cuddling. Oh and letting them watch as much television as they want guilt-free - that is, I don't feel guilty. I love that since my kids are still all so young when one, or two, or three, or all of them are sick, I try to throw out all other considerations. We hunker down for sick-fest: blankets and pillows on the couch, television, movies, whatever you want to eat, whenever (within reason). Of course it makes it much easier if a)there isn't an infant/baby who depends on you for pure sustenance and b) for everyone to be sick together or at the same level (rare). As frustrating as it can be, sometimes it is nice to have no better excuse to let bedtime rituals/routines fall by the wayside than they are sick - nothing else.

Now sick kids during the middle of the night? Whole other story.

Holidays

I love how the holidays take on a whole new meaning when you have kids. Actually, older kids. Since Hadley started school she 'gets' holidays a little bit more and it is fun to be excited with the kids for them. I am fortunate that I get to stay home with all of them all the time so a goal of mine is to keep with doing holiday festivities.