Two Years Old and thoughts

It is amazing how different "two" can look amongst children. I only say this b/c Lauren is such a different two year old than Hadley. Tonight she put on her pajama bottoms all by herself! She is such an independent little spirit and always insists on doing things 'self'. She can ride Vincent's tricycle - a skill Hadley was uninterested in learning until she was almost five. In the same ways Vincent takes after or looks to Hadley's example, Lauren does the same with Vincent. They are much more alike - except for tonight when I came downstairs and saw the girls both sitting with open library books on their laps. Vincent has NEVER looked through a book by himself. There again, Hadley at age two was well-versed and read books to herself all the time while Lauren is just becoming interested in them.

Ask more than just me but it feels like Lauren has been with us forever. There is no way she has only been here for two years, most of which she was just a baby. I don't know why this is. I have caught myself checking, double-checking my math and her birth date. It is amazing.

Every day I am amazed by the new skills they all acquire. I can't believe that I have two children who can dress themselves (for the most part). Maybe I never thought the day would come or I thought I'd always be dressing four kids but it doesn't happen like that. Someday we'll say goodbye to all diapers for good. Someday every one of them will dress themselves. And you know what . . . I think it'll be okay b/c then I know we'll be on to new and better things and doing more stuff.

"I have only known her for two years. But if you took every memory, every moment, if you stretched them end to end--they'd reach forever."
Jodi Picoult -My Sister's Keeper

This phrase struck me after Lauren's 2nd birthday this past week and thinking about all the memories of all of my children. As a mother, the memories of every moment are indelible.

Sick Days

Having sick kids is never a picnic. While some kids seem to handle illness better than others there is usually a little silver-lining: cuddling. Oh and letting them watch as much television as they want guilt-free - that is, I don't feel guilty. I love that since my kids are still all so young when one, or two, or three, or all of them are sick, I try to throw out all other considerations. We hunker down for sick-fest: blankets and pillows on the couch, television, movies, whatever you want to eat, whenever (within reason). Of course it makes it much easier if a)there isn't an infant/baby who depends on you for pure sustenance and b) for everyone to be sick together or at the same level (rare). As frustrating as it can be, sometimes it is nice to have no better excuse to let bedtime rituals/routines fall by the wayside than they are sick - nothing else.

Now sick kids during the middle of the night? Whole other story.

Holidays

I love how the holidays take on a whole new meaning when you have kids. Actually, older kids. Since Hadley started school she 'gets' holidays a little bit more and it is fun to be excited with the kids for them. I am fortunate that I get to stay home with all of them all the time so a goal of mine is to keep with doing holiday festivities.

Swing Shift

Vincent can be a handful when Hadley is away at school and it is late afternoon when a nap would do him the most good. The past few weeks I have tried my best to set aside this time to give him my full, undivided attention. If both Lauren and Gentry are sleeping this is made quite easier. We've played board games and computer games and he even sat and let me read him some library books. I wish I could say that it makes him less cranky later in the evening but that isn't true. However, I get to go to bed knowing that I put forth the effort and spent some time with him. It seems like every night I go to bed thinking about how little one-on-one or significant time I got to spend with any of the kids. It is amazing how long and slow a day can seem and also how quickly it can go by. Trying to do a little more with my kids and a little less of everything else is hard when you are task-oriented like I am. It feels so good though to have spent time with them during the day.

I was told about a talk Sister Julie Beck shared at a meeting for women. One woman summarized it as:

She talked about how she manages her day and uses her time. She shared with the audience the following:

"Sister Beck said she learned how to prioritize her time as a wife and mother while observing her father-in-law, a steel worker who at various times in his career worked the day, evening or night shift. She said she realized she was working all three shifts simultaneously, and she had to prioritize the demands on her so she could provide the service her family most needed.""The most valuable time of the day for a family," Sister Beck said, "is the afternoon/evening shift.""Be at the top of your game on swing shift," she said. "People are hungry, people are teachable. You feed them; that's when you serve them the most. Plan for swing shift, and then work the rest of your day around that."

For some reason this concept has really resonated with me. I find I am tired and feel somewhat lazy in the afternoons and always felt guilty if I wasted this time with a little nap or me-time doing something I enjoy. Now I actually try to plan to do those things so that I can be more attentive later. Obviously I imagine this will really mean even more when I have several children in school and so on. I love the point she makes about them being more 'teachable' at that time of the day. It is so true and I need to be on the top of my game for those opportunities.

Servicing Others

A lot of people offer help (namely visiting teachers) or ask if there is anything they can do to help, myself included. I've found that usually they are well-intentioned or genuine but just don't know how or what they can do to help. Sometimes we have to think a little bit harder on ways we can help someone. We have to be willing to give help that is 'outside of the box'. (As a side note, when someone offers you help, they usually mean it. Take them up on it.) I've come up with some ways to help or be helped:

1. I'd like my visiting teacher to come over and help a child read or read to my children so I can do some things at home in peace. This also doesn't require me to dress the kids, pack them up, drop them off somewhere and be back at a certain time. I can do laundry and work around the house while they are entertained.

2. Instead of bringing me sweets or cookies, how about a nutritious or healthy snacks. My kids will already eat anything sweet on their own - that isn't a novelty. But what if someone dropped off a new healthy snack that their kids enjoy - my kids just might enjoy that. Not to mention: I don't really need any more treats around the holidays to hide from my kids.

3. One things I did for a busy mom that I visit taught was created a FHE packet that included a lesson, activity, and refreshments. I was already making or preparing one for my own family so I just made an extra and dropped it off for her on a Sunday or Monday.

Jackpot

As I was walking out of a store the other day with all four kids in tow an older man passed me and said, "Wow, you really hit the jackpot!"

That is such a new and refreshing way of looking at it. I love that I didn't get the typical, 'wow you have your hands full' or 'wow I bet you're a busy mom.' How many of us moms think we hit the jackpot with our full brood?

He was right, I did hit the jackpot! My kids are so great that I willingly take all four kids out and they know how to behave.